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What Is Emotional Debt?

At some point in your life, you will get to a point where you will meet someone who you cannot afford to lose. Nevertheless, you still lose them and you go into debt. You go into emotional debt, and the faster you accept that you are in debt emotionally, the faster you can heal and clear the debt. It is only after you cleared your debt that you can afford to love again. It’s like being in financial trouble and instead of working on reducing your debt you just open another account, another credit card and you spend more, it gives you a sense of liquidity and comfort in that you have money to spend but you are still in debt.

The same concept goes for love, and heartbreak, when you come out of a relationship, rushing to replace the person you were with, or having so much sex won’t pay for emotional debt it just prolongs it or worse, increases it. This is because you are not really solving the underlying issues that caused the breakup. So at the moment when you hook up with someone else too quickly, you are finding peace with this other person, but when the moment is over, you are still heartbroken, you will still feel sad, and you will be angry and disappointed in yourself because you tried to replace someone with the idea of someone.

So what you really need to do is to put a pause on the emotional spending, you must be introspective and ready to face some harsh truths about yourself and your behavior. Take some time to take care of yourself and rebuild your emotional reserves, and pay off the debt, and once you have brought the emotional debt to a level you can control, you can spend again. Trust me a hookup that is motivated by anger, resentment, revenge, or spite, will come back to bite you the morning after. The reason is that you still have to face the reality that the person you really want to hook up with is not the person you woke up next to or the person you just spent the last half an hour making out with at a party.

However, it is not easy. You will have to put in the effort, and you might fail at first but you must work on fixing your emotional debt before you start spending on love again. If you do not, you will run into debt issues in the long run. You will always have anxiety that will prevent you from loving unconditionally, you will always engage in toxic behavior that drives people away, and you will never be vulnerable, and vulnerability is an essential ingredient in intimate relationships.

Recommend0 Simily SnapsPublished in All Stories, Coming of Age, Faith, Non-Fiction, Opinion Piece, Romance, Spirituality, Young Adult (YA)