I was an innocent, happy guy until one day I met it. The source of all evil. Cilantro… Photo by Suzy Hazelwood from Pexels Once…
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I was an innocent, happy guy until one day I met it.
The source of all evil.
Once upon a time, I was really hungry. So, as usual, I went to my favourite nearby salad place. I wanted to try something different this time and I ordered a new salad with a very risky dressing, jalapeño dressing. I bought the salad and walked to my home. I was really excited when I opened the package.
I made the biggest mistake of my life.
I ate it.
Just like the fire nation’s attack,
It was the worst possible taste that a human can experience. It was like aliens’ plan to make humans stop eating and lead them to die eventually.
As a very naive guy, unaware of Cilantro’s power of removing all the joy from any food it touches, I thought it must be that weird dressing that made it taste like that. And I said, “Ok, that’s it, no more jalapeño dressing ever again”.
You would have thought that Cilantro would be happy for its victory and stand aside.
But that is far from the truth, unfortunately.
We met at a restaurant again. This time I ordered some food with chicken in it. But I immediately knew as soon as I tasted it, it was my old enemy, jalapeño dressing.
But wait, this food didn’t have jalapeño dressing. So what could it be? At that time I started to investigate very seriously. I was eating every other particle from the food separately to find the source of this atrocity.
And here it was…
Some innocent-looking green herb.
Very small in size, but unbelievably terrible in taste. And people put that “thing” in their food voluntarily? At that exact moment, I knew something was wrong and I had to save the world from this evil herb.
I asked for the name of this destroyer of all happiness, to never forget its name again.
Its name was,
I started to search the internet to find out how a monstrosity like this could come to earth.
It turned out there is a special gene that makes Cilantro taste really terrible for some people. It says these people perceive the taste of Cilantro as very similar to soap. As a non-soap eater myself, I don’t want to test the similarity by eating soap. I had my portion of terrible tastes already.
According to Britannica:
For those cilantro-haters for whom the plant tastes like soap, the issue is genetic. These people have a variation in a group of olfactory-receptor genes that allows them to strongly perceive the soapy-flavoured aldehydes in cilantro leaves.
I believe all this scientific nonsense is made up by the secret Cilantrology society and it shouldn’t stop us from making the world cilantro-free.
So here I am,
Calling every citizen of the earth,
Join me and we can save the world from Cilantro.
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