Lolly McIntyre’s How to Survive in the Woods
“Hi, I’m Lolly McIntyre, sole survivor of the Evergreen Camp Massacre and veteran Slasher Hunter. This is my podcast, Lolly McIntyre’s How to survive In…
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“Hi, I’m Lolly McIntyre, sole survivor of the Evergreen Camp Massacre and veteran Slasher Hunter. This is my podcast, Lolly McIntyre’s How to survive In…
December 12, 2012 didn’t bring about the end of the world, but it did change the landscape of Earth. Instead of aliens or the Rapture,…
Sam Gambi, one of Meadowbrooke’s most notorious crime bosses yelled into his cell phone. “Wait, are you saying Dead Eye Dillion turned down my request?…
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Phillipe stared in horror at the gelatin dessert on the table in front of him, concealed fright radiating through his body with waves of burning…
Myrmidon Unit RG-899 waved good bye to the human mother and her brood of children as he walked down the dusty path to the city…
Tension settled in the auditorium as people were paying strict attention to their laptops. The faint noise of fingers typing on keyboards the only thing…
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It was a wonderful day, with a clear blue sky, a gentle breeze and the sun shining. However, a young woman named Julia wasn’t enjoying…
It was a wonderful day, with a clear blue sky, a gentle breeze and the sun shining. However, a young woman named Julia wasn’t enjoying the weather. She wore an orange trench coat with big black buttons running down the front and sat in an outdoor table under a rainbow umbrella at the Flavor Beans café. She had dishelved, shoulder length brown hair and brown eyes. She wore a perpetually worried look on her face, with dark bags around her eyes and pallid, lifeless skin. Her foot constantly tapped the paved ground, as if she was trying to get rid of her excessive, nervous energy.
She brought her hands to her head, tightly clutching handfuls of her hair. She gave out a long, deep groan of agony as she rested her head on her hands, her elbows supporting its weight. A kernel of doubt nestled in her stomach, causing it to rumble.
What the hell am I thinking? I can’t do this. She thought, a crippling wave of anxiety and self-loathing washing through her body. I don’t have the skills to pull it off. I’ll just screw it up and get into trouble. Mom was right, I’m a pathetic failure.
Julia raised her head up after spending a few minutes wallowing in self-pity. She looked around her immediate surroundings before focusing her attention on two women at a nearby table. One of them was an older woman with gray, curly hair. She wore a white shirt accented with thin, blue stripes. The other woman was much younger, her short, brown hair done in a stylish bob. She wore a light blue t-shirt. Julia’s instincts told her the two other women were mother and daughter. The two of them were having a lively conversation. Their observer wasn’t close enough to clearly hear what they were talking about, but their easy laughter indicated they were enjoying their time together.
Wow, it’s nice to see them getting alone. Way better than my own relationship with my horrible witch of a mother. Julia thought bitterly as she watched them enjoy themselves. I’m such a rotten coward, I’m just using this as an excuse to avoid doing what I really want. Thanks for the mental scars, Mom.
She watched as they finished their conversation, the older woman stood up and said something to her daughter. Julia guessed the mother was saying goodbye to her daughter. The younger woman also stood up and gave her mom a big hug. The latter returned the hug with such intensity, it made Julia squirm with envy. The older woman said a few words and then left. The daughter watched her leave before returning to her chair.
Julia kept observing as a waitress approached the table and asked the daughter for her order. She could be content to watch her all day. She certainly didn’t expect the other woman to glance at her when the waitress left. She was even more shocked when the latter smiled directly at her and waved.
Julia froze in shock, a warm blush of embarrassment radiating through her body. Why did she waved hello? Did the other woman want her to come over so she could have somebody to talk to? What if this was a horrendous prank? Traumatic memories flashed through Julia’s mind as she recalled a few of her high school classmates telling her to meet them somewhere so they could spend time with their new “bestest buddy”. Only to find herself the victim of a terrible prank when she waited the whole day for her ‘friends’ to join her at the abandoned factory ruins in the bad part of town. She didn’t think her heart could take another cruel rejection.
She glared again at the other woman, who simply smiled and beckoned with her hand to come. It was enough to get her to ignore her screaming instincts, she swallowed in a vain attempt to calm her nerves, her stomach rumbling with anxiety. She slowly walked towards the woman, her limbs felt like leaden weights she had to force to move towards her goal.
A quick glance at the table near of her showed the woman in a pleasant mood. There wasn’t any hint of impatience at her slow pace, only a gentle smile. Julia wondered if the benevolent demeanor was a trick to lure her into a false sense of security. After all, people were only nice when they either want something from you or want to hurt you. Her mother drilled the painful truth into her head with her terrifying mind games and bloody beatings. It left her a nervous, insecure wreck who only felt truly comfortable writing in her journal or shooting targets at the firing range.
Still, a small part of her did yearn to know what it was like to have real friends, to be confident to seize the day and do what she wanted. So she walked nervously the rest of the way to the table, hoping against all odds the woman was a genuinely nice person. As she finally reached the table, the other woman broke out in a huge grin.
“I’m glad you’re finally got the courage to come over here,” she said, sounding as if she was reuniting with an old friend rather than meeting with a total stranger, “I was worried you were going to run off there for a moment. You looked really nervous and frightened.”
The woman pulled out the empty chair located at her left side, gently patting the seat. Julia stared at the chair like it was a deadly snake ready to strike at her. It lasted for a few seconds, until the other woman made another welcoming gesture. Julia slowly walked to the chair and gently sat on it.
She cleared her throat in a vain attempt to quell the raging fear and anxiety inside of her before she spoke, “Um, hello” she said, hating how small and weak her voice sounded, “It’s really nice that you want to talk to me. My name is Julia. What’s your name?” Julia hesitantly put out her hand in a friendly gesture.
“My name is Erika,” the other woman said, gladly taking Julia’s hand and giving it a hardy handshake, “I took a chance and saw that you looked very lonely. So I invited you over to cheer you up.”
“Erm, thank you, you shouldn’t have,” Julia said, becoming more nervous when she found out Erika’s reason for inviting her. She wondered if she yet again stumbled into another trap where she would be abused and humiliated. A nasty thought whispered in the back of her head. Mother was right, you are too stupid for your own good. It sounded eerily like her mother’s voice, loaded with bitterness and barely concealed contempt. She shivered involuntary at the memory of her mother.
“Is your trench coat warm enough?” Erika said, noticing Julia wrapping her arms around herself as she shivered, “It looks like you’re cold.”
“I’m not cold,” Julia said, holding herself for a few seconds before she put her arms down, “I was just thinking about my mother. She wasn’t a very nice person.”
“Wow, that sucks,” Erika replied, putting a consoling hand on her shoulder. She pulled back when she saw Julia winch at the touch, “Tell you what, why don’t I buy you a nice steaming cup of tea. I always find that drinking something hot and soothing helps to calm me down.”
“Okay, thanks,” Julia said, not mentioning her mother would drink tea religiously every time she heaped abuse on her daughter. She didn’t want to anger this nice woman who was willing to risk getting hurt by asking a total stranger to sit with her.
“You’re welcome,” Erika said, breaking out in a big smile. “Hey waiter!” she raised her hand to a nearby waiter who was walking near them. The latter noticed the gesture and walked over to them.
“Hi, may I help you?” the waitress said, getting her notepad ready, her red pencil hovering over it.
“I would like two Chamomile teas for me and my new friend,” Erika said, causing Julia to hide her face with her hands, blushing a deep red.
“Alright, do you want anything else?” she replied, “Any appetizers or main dishes?”
“No thanks,” Erika said, “But thank you, though.”
“You’re welcome. I’ll be back soon with your drinks,” the waitress said, before she walked into the café.
Julia hadn’t expected the waitress to come back so soon. In about five minutes, she returned with two steaming cups of hot water, each with had a single packet of Chamomile tea placed next to the cups’ handle. The color of the cups and the small plates they were on were a rich cyan. The waitress gently placed the items in front of them.
“Would you like anything else to go with it,” the waitress said.
“No thank you,” Erika replied.
“Alright, enjoy your tea,” the waitress said, leaving their table with a grace Julia envied.
“We will,” Erika said, before she opened up her packet and put it in her cup. Julia stared at her for a moment before she copied Erika’s actions.
“You can decide for yourself how long you want to leave the bag in the cup,” Erika said, “There’s no need to rely on me on how you want your tea done.”
“Thanks,” Julia said with a shy smile, “Nobody ever let me do my own things like making my own tea without criticizing me every step along the way.”
“Bummer,” Erika said, her eyes raising in sympathy, “That does sound pretty bad. Would you like to talk about it?”
Julia was about to turn her kind offer down when a small nudge of emotion urged her to take a chance. She decided to vent, despite her fears about Erika laughing at her once she revealed everything. She bit the bullet and poured her heart out to Erika. Julia was already used to people mocking and teasing her, one more snide comment wouldn’t destroy her.
She told Erika all about her crappy childhood and how her Mom would berate her for every single mistake she made. Her father left the family when she was about a year old, causing her Mother to become bitter and cold. Since she couldn’t punish her deadbeat husband, she would unleash all of her frustration and rage on her daughter instead. The constant abuse turned Julia into a screw-up, emotional mess who couldn’t have a close relationship with her peers even if she tried. The other girls were completely unforgiving of her weakness and happily picked on her whenever possible.
Erika didn’t say anything while Julia talked. She simply drank her tea and nodded in sympathy during some of the more painful parts of Julia’s story. Occasionally, she would put a comforting hand on Julia’s shoulder, petting softly. Julia was touched by Erika’s kindness. She did her best to see if she could detect any duplicity or guile on the other woman’s face through her tears. But she was only able to detect a seemingly boundless compassion from Erika. It looked like Erika was one of the rare people who wasn’t trying to take advantage of her. A storm of relief blew through her soul before she spoke again.
“I was going to do something really important today,” Julia said, wiping her eyes with a napkin, “But as I was about to do it, the voice of my mother rang through my mind, telling me I was too pathetic to actually go through with something because I was a sniveling, weak-willed wimp. I tried to ignore her voice inside my head, but I couldn’t do it. It just got louder every time I tried to ignore her. That was when I came to the Flavor Beans Café to see if I could squish that horrible voice. But I found out I couldn’t, I was too paralyzed with self-loathing to get my butt out of the chair and do something.”
She put her head in her hands, taking a break from the emotional strain her confession wrung out of her. Julia just wanted to crawl into a dark hole somewhere and sleep the rest of her life away. She was tired of having to deal with the constant crap life threw at her. Couldn’t somebody else have her shitty life instead?
Erika didn’t say anything for a while. She just looked thoughtful as she put her hand on Julia’s, humming softly as she gently rubbed it. Julia smiled a bit, enjoying the sensation of somebody touching her nicely. A minute passed before Erika let go of Julia’s hand, causing the latter to look up at her, wondering what was going on. A small part of Julia feared the emotional rug was going to be pulled out from under her in the most brutal manner possible.
“Julia, I really hope you don’t take this the wrong way,” Erika said, thoughtful concern on her face, “But it sounds like that your Mom is a total bitch.”
Julia’s eyes widened in shock, her mouth hanging open. Nobody had ever said anything like that to her before. But then, she never told a total stranger about her horrible childhood before either.
“I mean, how dare she try to blame you for what was clearly your Dad’s fault,” Erika said, her voice becoming animated as she continued her angry rant, “Nothing can justify a parent abusing their own child because somebody clearly wasn’t man enough to take care of his family. Parents like that should have their children taken away from them immediately, and thrown into a deep, dark cell where they’ll never see the light of day ever again.”
Julia burst out into laughter so hard at Erika’s rant, she had to hold her stomach as she doubled over. It felt wonderful to laugh out loud after the wave of crippling insecurity and self-loathing she suffered throughout her life. Her body seemed to relax with relief from her emotional burden even as she held herself tightly so she wouldn’t accidently hit the table. Erika sat there smiling as she watched Julia laugh.
Julia took a few deep breaths as her laughter died down, wiping the tears from her eyes. She sat straight up, taking a few more breaths before she began to speak.
“Thank you for showing compassion,” Julia said, smiling gently, “Although, I must admit I wasn’t expecting an angry diatribe like that.”
“Well, anybody who would mistreat a child doesn’t deserve to be a parent,” Erika said, “Your Mom has no right to shred your self-esteem like that. If she were here right now, I’d give her a piece of my mind.”
“That’s good to know,” Julia said, “Still, even though a part of me knows that my Mom’s words aren’t true; my own insecurities are still telling me that I’ll never be able to do what I wanted to do today because I’m such a pathetic loser. I can’t seem to banish those horrible feelings away no matter how much I try.”
“Julia, I know what I’m going to say is going to sound like something out of a cheesy Hallmark commercial,” Erika said, reaching over to hold Julia’s hands in her own, “You should do the thing you’re going to do even if you’re feeling insecure. True bravery isn’t about having no fear, but doing the thing that makes you feel afraid no matter how strong the temptation to give up can be at times. Even if you fail at your goal, at least you won’t be haunted by the guilt of passing up an opportunity.”
“Wow, that’s good advice,” Julia said, genuinely amazed at Erika’s thoughtfulness, “My Mom would just say to stop being a pathetic wimp and toughen up. It’s good to know that it’s okay to feel fear and anxiety.”
“Julia, the things isn’t to never make mistakes, but to learn from them so you can become a better person.” Erika said, letting go of her hands so she could give Julia a comforting pat on her shoulder, “If you don’t succeed today, you’ll always have tomorrow to try again.”
“Thank you for the encouragement,” Julia said, “It’s really important that I do this today. I may not get another chance after today and I know that I’ll hate myself forever if I don’t do this.”
“You’re way too hard on yourself,” Erika replied, patting Julia’s shoulder again, “You should take the opportunity now. You’ll feel good about mastering your fear.”
“Thanks, I better get my butt in gear pronto,” Julia said, her chair screeching on the stone pavement as she pushed it away from the table and stood up, “Do you want me to pay for the Chamomile tea? I’d hate to mooch off of your kindness.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Erika said, shaking her hand, “You’re not going to send me into the poor house.” Julia couldn’t help but chuckle at Erika’s last comment.
“That’s good to know,” Julia said, taking a quick glance at her watch, “Holy crap, I only have a half hour left. I need to hurry or I’ll miss it. Good bye and thank you for all of the kind words. Even if we never meet again, I’ll never forget you.”
“I visit Flavor Beans Café every Friday and buy tea and a pastry,” Erika said, chuckling, “If you ever want to see me again, this is the perfect place to do it.”
“That’s wonderful,” Julia said. She gently pushed the chair back in and walked away, turning around to give a quick goodbye wave before heading off. Erika waved back until Julia could no longer be seen.
“Despite her insecurities, Julia’s a pretty nice person,” Erika said, gesturing for a nearby waitress to show she was done with her drink, “Still, I have to wonder what she was planning to do, since she never told me the details. I hope her life changes for the better once she does what she was so afraid to do.”
#
Julia looked around the sidewalk to see if anybody else was there. When she was certain there weren’t any other pedestrians, she snuck into the nearby alleyway. She leaned against the reddish brown, brick wall, taking a few deep breaths before unbuttoning her coat. She looked at the inside of her coat, unzipping the inside pocket and taking out the Colt 1911 gun. Julia gave a small cooing sound as she gently touched it.
“I took a huge risk getting you out of Mom’s security case,” she said, rubbing it to give her strength, “I just know that it’s all going to be worth it. Not only am I going to prove to the world that I’m not a pathetic loser, I’m going to kill that horrible Mayoral Candidate that Mom loves so much.”
Julia had to tolerate her mother’s passionate ranting about how Edward Hilt, one of the candidates for city mayor, was going to be the perfect leader and get rid of all of the degenerate filth polluting their once great city. To Julia, Mr. Hilt was a typical right-wing asshole who denied people the social services they so desperately needed. Every time Julia tried to get a word in edgewise criticizing Edward Hilt, her mother would freak out, screaming right in her face about how horrible it was her own daughter was one of those degenerate, filthy hippies. Julia would then spew out a flurry of apologies so she wouldn’t get hit by her mother. It didn’t always worked.
She decided she had to get rid of Edward Hilt before he ever got a chance to run the city in to the ground. In her desire to kill him; she went on the internet to find out the date and place of his next rally. The thought of an escape route didn’t even cross her mind. What was important was Edward Hilt not winning the election, the consequences were much too horrible to contemplate. Besides, a lot of people hated him as well, if last week’s protest focusing on the sexual assault accusations had anything to do about it.
Thank heavens for that pep talk with Erika. Julia thought. I would never have been able to go through with it if it weren’t for her encouragement. I’ll have to thank her if I manage to survive. Well, time to stop stalling and do the deed. You’ll never be able to get another chance after today.
She poked her head out of the alleyway to see if he had arrived yet. A long black limo with two police cars placed at the front and back of vehicle came into view. A small smile spread on her face as her hand trembled slightly. Her target was here! All she had to do was wait until he got out of the limo, then she would pretend to be a clueless tourist who couldn’t find her hotel and play into Hilt’s vanity. Once he let down his guard, she would plug him with the full clip of her gun. Julia knew she would have to run afterwards, but she wasn’t sure if she could outrun his bodyguards.
This is no time to be worrying about if you can escape or not! Julia thought, shaking her head. You need to focus on killing Edward Hilt, nothing else matters. Stop worrying and do what you got to do.
Julia watched as the limo door opened and two large men wearing black business suits with grey ties came out first. A brown haired man about half the height of his bodyguards came out between them. One of the bodyguards closed the car door and resumed his position at the man’s side. It was safe to say the brown haired man was the notorious Edward Hilt. The trio walked away from the car to the front of the building, where Hilt’s supporters could be seen putting up signs and decorations encouraging onlookers to vote for Edward Hilt.
She gulped in nervous anxiety as she studied her target. It was obvious she just couldn’t go up and shoot him. Not when he had two bodyguards at his side. Her best bet was to wait until the rally officially started so a protective crowd would form. Julia would pretend to be one of Edward Hilt’s biggest fans, until she got close to him. She would then use the element of surprise to unload her gun on him and escape back into the crowd before his bodyguards had time to react. Still, a part of her was hoping the bodyguards would be able to catch her. It would be a terrible shame if the public never found out who killed Edward Hilt. The acknowledgement would give her the validation her non-existent self-esteem so desperately needed.
Julia moved back into the alleyway so she wouldn’t be spotted by her target. She opened her jacket and put the gun back in the inside pocket. She took a few deep breaths so she could get her frantic nerves under control. She straightened her clothes and brushed her hair so she wouldn’t look suspicious. After all, people usually assumed the messy, ugly ones were deadly killers.
When she finished, Julia looked at her watch. It was 15 minutes until the rally, so she needed to get her butt in there pronto. She took one last deep breath before leaving the alleyway and heading towards the rally grounds. Whatever happened, Julia hoped she would make some meaningful impact, even if she didn’t kill Edward Hilt.
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